January
I was looking at the door, hoping you would turn around to see me.
I have always wanted to be with you and spend all my time with you but this feeling is only beautiful when it is mutual .
Once you love the person, it’s over. it is not possible to be friends again.
Hey pengi, I know you don't want to be in a relationship with me. But I always had this hope that you would someday accept me. But I have come to realize that you were given many chances to choose me over Chinnu and Rithish, but you chose them. I know that even if we went back in time, you would choose them over me any day.
There’s this line from himym by Barney “I'm done trying to get you. I can't do it anymore. I'm sorry it's taken me this long to figure it out, but I promise... I'm done making a fool of myself.”
I can now see why we can't happen. I can see that now. So there is no point in me trying to impress you. What is not meant to be yours will never be yours, no matter how hard you try.
I stuck around, because you said you didn't have anyone. Well, you have some people now. Look around you. You didn't realize it, but you do have them. And you won't find a replacement for me, but you'll find someone better. Or, who knows, you already found them.
These were running in my mind for a very long time and ever after I have always tried to create mental pictures of memories with you. The car ride, the roses, the texts, the food, the talks and the FaceTimes. They will stay where ever I go till the end just like my shadow.
You never leave me, you never left me, it’s always me who leaves I know that I have promised that I would not you this time. This isn’t a good bye. Let’s hope that in the near future that our paths cross and we can have good laughs.
I tried!
Did I give my best? Yes. I know it’s hard to let go and I am ready. But how can I ? Is there a way? Show me the way.
A little happiness towards me would have be been great. It would have made my day
I look at the door
Hoping I could see you
I was disappointing
I thought you would be excited to see me and thought you wanted to spend time with me. It’s okay. I think it’s a chapter I need to Learn and I will. I’ll try I’ll keep trying until time shows some sign or a way. I wait for it.
And that smile give you when I have been hurt, it gives a different feeling. A feeling that can’t be described but an i
From paper:
So I sat here with this book and music playing through my earphones. I wonder why can't you choose me? then it me I am not as pretty as him I don't even know about you as much as he does, I don't even know how to take good care of you now I will I ever love you as much as he did? My love is small, maybe you were right and I was wrong I didn't deserve you. I had neither the qualities you want. I'm a waste. I'm useless to you but for me you are everything you're too perfect for me and maybe that's why I can't have you that's what people say you have the perfect things
My mom gave everything she had, to me. She sacrificed things, for me. Now I find a girl who is worthy. And everything of me given to her. And she then passes on to the kids
Bambino
Missing you
What if I had strong one more time, maybe after this you would have realised my efforts my everything and start loving. I know I leaving you was hard, will we come back together and stronger??? I really wanna talk to you badly, maybe this time you try for once? After all this time maybe you should realise this time and come back , fight back? Would you do this for me? Can you for once?
I gave all my love then you said my love is nothing compared to your ex. It was all my love all my. You said you would never compare me to your ex’s and whenever I asked you would leave me when you find someone better than me you said you wouldn’t. But look at you now saying I would choose better ice cream.
It really hurt, but still I would love come back and forget about apologise, I really wanna come back to you.
hey
15th april 2024
the search is over babe. there’s no point in other girls existing. they serve no purpose. i won’t even look at them. you are all i need. i love you baby. my heart is beating faster when i think of the future. i really really hope for our future. i’ll not leave you that’s the promise. every second i think you are the first thought in my mind.
17th april 2024
the most beautiful woman ever. the way is walks, the way is looks the smile everything. i’m gonna die of happiness the moment i marry her. i can’t man i can’t wait to hug her. i wanna spend every second of my life with her. every moment with her. don’t be sacred let me love you. i’ll not let you down. i regret loosing you
I don’t wanna grow up. I don’t like this kind of love. It was never with about the way you look or it was nothing physical. It was just pure. I don’t. I don’t wanna grow up. I mean I do love you sexually and all I do love you normally, also, but before before like few years ago, it was there was only soul kind of love. I know. I know this is part of growing up. I don’t wanna grow up. It’s fine.
hi, I really like you. I love you. I really don’t wanna lose you. I already the time where I lost you. I don’t know. It has always been in the month of January February and, March I guess. I don’t know. I’m not sure. but this time I don’t, I don’t think I can leave you. I want you to be there with me. It’s been the rest of your life with me. I know the big step. I know it’s scary. I’m scared to. I’m really scared. all this time, we stop talking. It was all friendship, it was never relationship, relationship or anything, what if we do some mistake and will lose this?, will we be able to pick it up, where we left continue. Babe, I really don’t know what to do. I really wanna be with you. I am serious about it. I know it already depends on our future. I miss you every day and I can’t stop. I wanna be with you, babe. I know you need time you take time. You are the best person I’ve ever seen. You are the perfect woman for me, and I wanna be the perfect man for you, it will take time for me to be perfect, slowly, but surely I’ll be perfect. I promise I work on myself. I’ll try to do better. I’ll try to be better. Teach me. I learn from it. Scold me. I listen to you. Make me a better man. I won’t leave you. I know you wouldn’t either we have to stay strong, no matter what happens. We might have trust issues or we might over think about a small thing. I don’t want that to destroy us. Try to communicate with me every day. I communicate with you every day. We will be together, trust me. I loveyou. I never stop, loving you. I love you all. no matter what you been through, what you’re going through, I always be your side. I will always have your back mentally, emotionally and physically I’ll have your back. I love you so much.
My sweetheart, my baby girl, my babe. My everything, my best.
i don’t wanna have too much in common with you like parallel lines. they never meet nor i wanna be opposite like perpendicular lines where the meet once and drift away and never meet again.
“you really love her don’t you?” they asked. i have never loved someone like you. you are tge apple of my eye there’s nothing that i need. i’ll follow you to your home, through the traffic, in the hot weather. there’s nothing i’m in need of.
Gen 2:18 Then God said: “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner.” God has sent me the women i’ve been praying for. i must continue praying and working hard for her.
hey baby, I’m really sorry about the way I reacted in the car. I know I should have reacted that much because of that. I killed the time we had. I spoiled out both mood. I’m really sorry. I really love you, babe. all i can think about is the case you gave to my heart while leaving theology. It is so unexpected. It is like I don’t know how to explain was very beautiful. Very magical. It was all very nice. You know what the best part was about that day when I was coming with lilies to show you that. and you kissed me that was like the best thing that has happened, and the kiss was so soft and beautiful. I just wanted to sit down and take a deep breath. babe. That was so beautiful, babe. I want this. I want us to happen. it might be. It might be difficult. Let’s hope let’s stay strong. I love you and you love me. That’s all it matters. That’s the motivation that’s a marriage life, it will be beautiful it will be up and down. will go up together will come down together will stay strong together. now I feel like looking at your photo and smile now I will go and send this para and open Instagram open the kanda account and look at highlights of a story the way you have shown seeing that story, seeing the highlights makes me so happy. It makes me realise how much you love me. This is all I ever wanted. I know in the car I said, I expected more. but the highlight in your account, I’m looking at it. Look at it and sleep. I kiss the photo in the hidden gallery.
And realise how lucky I am to have you, I love you, good night, my baby, my sweetheart, my lovely angel Apple of my eyes, my everything, love you more.
hello my baby, my sweetie, little baby, my small baby, my cutie pie, the apple of my eye. I feel like hugging you and sleeping right now. I miss you a lot. I know I keep talking to you every time. I know I’ll call you every time, but I know when you’re not around, I still miss you , you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I don’t know from the beginning of the year 2024 from day one. I understood that this year ain’t gonna be that great. because of the day and I lost thousand rupees that I understood, but look now now I’ve got you. This is the best year. when the AI asked from how long have you been in a relationship and you said 55 days. I was genuinely surprised that you count the days. I don’t know it felt nice. It went lovely. It felt good that you counted the days. It’s been 55 days so many days, it really feels like the March was last month. da baby, I’m in so in love with you. I just wanna be with you now now. I don’t feel anything sexual. I just wanna hug you and sleep. Talk to you and sleep. I just wanna sleep with you or I wanna see you sleep next to me, I will be looking at your face, but you will be asleep. then, when I feel sleepy, I’ll kiss you on the forehead, and then I go to sleep. I really want all of this. I really wanna marry you. I really wanna spend my life with you. I really can’t imagine my life with someone else. I love you a lot. I hope the future is in favour of us. Love you, baby. I wish I could kiss them your nose. I wish I could park my vehicle inside. your ear. This is so cute and tiny your eyes. I’m completely lost when I look into your eyes when I look into your eyes, I forget everything that is happening in my surroundings. Your forehead. I wish I could kiss there. your hairs wish I could play with your hair. I really miss you baby. I wanna be with you. It’s not on your face. I love your body. Also, I mean I told you about your body, but not in a sexual way. I really love it. I love everything of you and your nails everything baby, everything, even if it’s ugly, bad good, it doesn’t matter, it’s you and Ilove you ❤️.
Hey baby, hi, how are you? I did not know how to start the paragraph so I started it up like that. I don’t want this paragraph to be aboutthe justifications. I really don’t know what I’m going to write on this paragraph.
I fell in love with you before I knew how to. I kissed you before I knew how to. I’ll spend my whole my whole life with you without you. It’s like missing a part of me. I hope your heart is free. And I lost you then, on March 10, the craziest things happened, then they were things that opened my heart. Close my eyes kiss on your lips. Next few days thinking of it, just wondering if I’m worth to have you in my life. you look so pretty, and I swear there is no one like you looking in the moon. I admire your beauty, You will always be my girl, my world, you will be my girl. you just look like a dream, the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen when I’m with you. You know that I got you. I think I’m gonna love you till I’m dead and can’t wait to buy you things I can’t afford. I will buy you diamond ring, I’ll take you out on a car cruising. will go on a date and spend time together. there is no one else like you. If you don’t know that I’m gonna stay by the way, I hold you, my hearts been yours, the whole time. I thought I knew every little thing about you, even though there is always more of you to learn. I’ll always be here for you, I hope. I show that I am always here for you, and I’m not leaving you. I can’t explain it and I don’t know what to call it, but I know. I always fall in love with you a Little Bit More every time, even on the days, I’m not talking to you. baby, don’t be scared. even if I look everywhere, you you have got my eye, and you’re my favourite thing to see. It’s everything that you do that makes me realise that I love you. You turn every sad song into a happy song. Every sad memory is replaced with a happy memory, and when I close my eyes, I’m still seeing you. The time is moving slow and we are dancing holding hands, then goes to your neck. We make eye contact and lips and lips will touch. It’s all so beautiful babe, so beautiful. imagine. my one hand is on your cheeks. The other hand is on your hips. We dancing to the song. Slowly holding on to your hips. Look in your eyes and I tell I love you. Then you give me a kiss. I blush, and we continue dancing forever, all the imaginations with your beautiful babe. I need you. I want you, you are all I got. I just wanna be yours I never run. I’ll be your healer. You will be my angel. Let me be your comfort room, and you be my bedroom. That was nice alwa?
Okay, coming back. I know this is hard. Commitments aren’t easy, our hearts are beating faster. Whatever you need, just know, I’ll be there no matter how is I’ll climb up the swim through the rivers, cross the roads, whatever it is. I’ll be there. Just know that unlike my mood, my heart is not changing. It’s fixed to you.
Let my love be your shelter.
Let my love. Keep yourself from the weather. Everything is okay when we are together.
i love you ♥️
14th May,
I think I have to stop taking about your body. I felt so cos you have started to wear tshits instead of those comfy half shirts. Because when you wear those I take screenshots and I comment on the bra colour you wear. I have asked you multiple times does it make you uncomfortable? You always said no. but the actions speak louder than words. So I think I should stop doing this. Also also, I think the love is reducing coz when there is love, you would risk everything for me like how you came for the movie. Look at you now you wont even come to meet me at 9:45, giving reasons not to meet. And before even when you said you have to go back at early ,say 7, you were going at 8. Now you go back at 6:30 itself. Im not telling love is not there, im just telling it reduced a little bit. Im already of this reduced love.
Hi, I really don't know how to write you already know how much I love you and how far I go for you. You know which I care for you, I am might not know everything about you. I know I'm not like the boyfriend you want me to be. I know I know I don't have the qualities, but I wanna be with you. Spend time with you. Tell the in future that I love you. I want this para to bring a big smile in the morning. write something nice. You're always the nicest person. I know the most prettiest woman achievement is not a thing, babe. for me, You are an achievement. proud achievement that is in my heart, always beating always reminding me that you are the biggest achievement. I got in my life. I will never take your for granted. I never take our love as an excuse. I'm proud of my love, and I don't want anyone to compare this love for me to anything else, neither to the gods nor to humans. I say, my love is bigger than anyone’s. it's bigger than the gods bigger than the whole universe. It's the mightiest thing. I know I get angry, frustrated and easily. That is just temporary. It fits very quickly when you say sorry it's like the sun stop burning. The moon stops glowing and the stars stop sparkling your sorry makes the whole universe stop. You just look like a dream, the prettiest girl the world has ever seen. Just wanna be in your arms and never let go if you let go. I'll go to the darkness. I love you. I love you again. I love you again and again and fall in love, deep deeper deeper that I would never be able to return. Your eyes when they so gorgeous, your hair smells like you when I hug I smell your hair. and when you smile your whole surrounding smiles. If you are a flower, you're beautiful than roses. Cherish every moment I spend with you, they are not coming back and hold on to you while I can, and hold onto your heart forever. I love you so much, I miss you every day. Thank you for being in my life. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for your existing. Thank you.
be your everything
hope of love
To my angry Bird ,
Hey baby, yesterday, thank you for hugging me ,the side hug, in Chillax. there it felt that you’re not going to leave. I’m sorry I know I make you sad, sometimes. but it’s not intentional. I never see you cry never and I never wanna be the reason I don’t want to be a reason, babe when your low I want you to come to me, but look at me. I am the one who is making you low, I don’t know that I try to make you happy. I promise I promise, every day, I’m getting better. I can feel it. I’ll be the man you want and be the man of your dreams. I’ll try to work on us. I’ll try to give you peace. Give you happiness. Give you everything that you never need. I’ll be there. I need you. I really do. I love you. That is true. I love you more than anything. You are the most beautiful thing that I ever have. I love you and I don’t wanna lose you.
six years ago today, I proposed you. I was so immature that day, I did not know the spelling of love. It was like that. look at me now, thinking of marrying you and I’m serious of it. Just six years. I know six years, not how I imagine it would go. but I hope the next 60 years would go as we planned. I can love no one else. I don’t know how to love someone else other than you all my life. I’ve been loving you. I really don’t know how to love someone else. sometimes, I see this future, and this future is only with you. these futures are beautiful because you are in it. And our kids are beautiful in it. baby, I know loving is hard and thank you for loving me. I know you’re broke your heart twice in last six years. Next time, it’s gonna break is in next 60 years. you happened to me and that’s the best thing that has ever happened. I will never let go of you. No matter how hard our lives get. I always treat you like a princess cause you’re one. You are the Apple of my eye. you deserve not a bouquet of flowers, but whole garden. I love you more than anything else, babe. I mean it in the future. It might get difficult. Trust me. It’s gonna be fine because I’ll be by your side. No matter what I’ll be by your side family problem, happy by your side to solve it, I trust you more than anything else. I know even you do and I love it when I put my inside you. I feel that’s where I belong. I feel I belong inside you. I feel like I wanna be inside you. That’s why I put my little version inside inside you, that little version will grow up and become a son or daughter depends. I really hope I’m treating you well. I know act like an immature baby sometimes. I’ll grow. I know you know. I know you’ll make me grow i have much faith in you. Have given you my hundred percent and I want you, and I shall continue giving my hundred percent, thank you for being with me, thank you so much. I love you the most baby. Damn baby, six years, I still can’t believe it lo. After five years, you accepted me today. I had completely forgot about this day. I don’t know how did I forget about this day. I was looking forward to this day from last month, and I completely forgot. Even if I forgot, my heart, didn’t it knows so the act proposed with the ring, even though it was yours. the heart does what it feels like doing. I can’t stop it and let it. I don’t know where it will take me. Always take me back to you. I love you. Have a good day today, baby. Good morning. ❤️
hey baby ma, I love you so much, baby when I’m kissing you. I just wanna be there when I’m asking you. I wanna hug you tight. When I put my hand inside you I just want my hand to stay inside you forever. I just wanna be there with you. I just want you. I just wanna touch you. I just wanna be in your arms. I know you trust me completely, and i too do. I wanna spend my future with you and with no one else. I can’t imagine with someone else. Also, I want it to be you. I don’t know whatever you’re doing where it will head. But I hope it’s something good for us. I love you. today, when I touched your boobs, it was the best thing ever. I mean, the best thing ever I wish I could see it every day it would make me very happy. I wish I could kiss you every day. Did you know I asked for your tongue and you gave me your tongue, and I tasted your tongue. It was awesome, and when I put my hand back of inside you. I did not feel disgusted or anything. I just wanted my hand to be there. I know it I need you no matter what I fight for you. I want you to be mine. I love you. I love you a lot. I wanna kiss you every day. Stay with me, baby. Stay with me.
hello baby, hi, I know you’re in pain your stomach. I wish I could be there. I wish I could take the pain away. I wish I could feel the pain instead of you. I really mean it. I miss you if I could be there with you. I would be with you . I wanna do something. I wanna grow up. I wanna make you proud. I want you to be proud, I want you to be proud that you have a boyfriend like me. I wanna do something and I wanna do something with you. i want you to be there next to me always please don’t leave me. I love you more than anything else. I can’t lose you. I have seen my wife in your. I’ve seen. Don’t leave you no matter how hard it gets. if I leave you, I know I’ll lose you and not find you again. I wish I could every day. I wish I could kiss you every day. I wish I could be with you every day. I wish I could get bitten every day, get slapped every day, everything I wanna be with you every day. right now, I am cooking Maggi. If you are come home, even I would have made you Maggi or I would’ve ordered something healthy. Or search on YouTube and learn to cook Something healthy. Make you lie on my bed and then get the food to the bed. Kiss you on forehead. and make you go sleep. have exam now and I do well. I love you. I love you more than anything else. I know we fight sometimes, but a heart is bound to each other. and it’s not going anywhere. I love is not going anywhere. I love you to the moon and back.
you my baby and i know you’ll fix me. because i know you can. because you love me for me. you love me for who i am. not for how i look or anything.
it’s 4:06 and am already missing you baby. i’m wondering will you reply or not. will you ignore me for 24 hours or i don’t know.
every time i write a long paragraph after you sleep, i used to write thinking it would make you simile when you wake up. i don’t if this is gonna get you a simile, if it doesn’t make your heart beat faster or don’t make your body feel lighter or if it doesn’t feel you happy then don’t reply to this message, just leave it on seen.
heyyy baby ma,
i know i don’t stay near you, but i hope not but if something does happen just i wanna tell you that my soul would leave and come to see you because my body physically wouldn’t be able to see you so early. i know i have to do something to make you proud, but i always not do anything. even when you with me im not doing anything to make you happy, i don’t even know your happiness. i don’t know what makes you happy. i don’t know how to comfort you when’s you are going through something. how am i even treating you, what kind of life am i even leading? kill me already. now you are saying “I loved ur innocence I loved ur eyes they also said u loved me I could see tht but now I don’t know where tht has disappeared“ how am i supposed to react to this? i know i always ask you to forgive me. and you always do, expecting me to change but im not doing anything to make you feel right in fact im making you love me even less and make you feel ashamed of my love. im make you feel restricted instead of making you feel free. Baby I miss you, but its no excuse to forgive me, you shouldn’t forgive me until I change, ill do it ill make things right, ill do whatever to takes, ill do things.i have the energy to do things. I want you to know I love you with everything.
Hello baby, so we have completed our 5 months. Im excited to see us celebrate our 50 years, I dont know how things are gonna go. But I hope it rolls in our favor. I know you were mad at me yesterday, I know you missed me a lot, I did too. I can understand you are at home and have a lot of work to complete and festivals coming. But the care of your self too baby, dont get stressed out. Im here and will listen to you. Right now it’s almost 1:30 am, I am sleepy, I saw series and I took a very long bath. I miss you, I wish I could do FaceTime and see you sleep. Baby ma, just know that I will not leave your and will be around you itself. We fight we fix. You are the best thing that has happened to me. I will not let go of it easily. when you said you were remembering that day when I came to your room. I wish I could come to you room at that time itself. I think of those moments, every moments with you everytime. Lets go on a date babe, its been a long time. We will go somewhere fancy and have a great good time. bill is on who ever is shorter. Sari I’ll go to sleep now, good night baby ma. Love you.
hey baby, it feels like it’s been so long since I wrote you long paragraph so here is one.
this time when we fought deep inside, I can feel that you have not forgiven me completely. It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I’m supposed to fix this one. It’s my duty and I will fix it. Thank you for giving me a chance. Thank you for kissing me while coming down the staircase . Show that I have not lost you. I lost control near the staircase. I am sorry for that. I wish I could stay there for a little longer. I want you. I want to be part of you. I want to be part of you to go inside me. I wanna hug you. I feel every inch. I wanna kiss you. I hold you, I hug you every day, your lips every day. Make you loved every day. Be with you with all the ups and downs. I’ll be there. I’ll not go anywhere and always be by your side. I will make you cry. I won’t let you be in your sadness. I don’t want you to think of me and stay sad. Whenever you think of me, it should bring a smile in your face that I wish her my baby. I love you.
——————
Dear Pushkar
Ok I sorry for the way I treated you. You have always been my best part I always cherish the moment we had together. I’m sorry I couldn’t give you my shoulders when you were crying. That was because I know I know if I would have given, we would have got back together. I know I had to hug you tight and stay. It’s okay. It’s going to be fine. We’re gonna work it out when we were on the stairs I control myself so much not to break down seeing you breakdown. I know if I would break down in front of you, and you would also cry more. I became so heartless when you cried because I wanted you to let me go holding onto each other is hurting us. you said you gonna work on yourself and get back to me being my dream boy, maybe the love I have for you today. Won’t be there for tomorrow and maybe the love. I have for you tomorrow. Won’t be there for day after because you have never tried to increase the love, you always try to decrease. I have loved you with all of my heart. All of my heart, and I have no regrets when you come back to me, saying Shravya look. I have changed. I still feel scared to get back to you. I want to hold your hand tight and make you feel happy. Feel loved like I always did, but today I was so saturated, so frustrated, so in anger i’m really sorry I didn’t mean to hurt you. You should work on yourself, maybe not for me, but for the girl you’re gonna find tomorrow, I will miss you. I will miss our talks. I will miss everything we had together, but then I also miss the old me, who is happy with you, but me now is sad with you. Anyway. I wish you all the success, all the love, all the money. All the wealth. All the health to be with you
Even in my dreams, I try to call you 100 times
You have become a habit to me
I am not able to stay alone
I am unable to get along with anyone
I will never forget this smile. You always got on my face, and I will never forget your smile.
Take care
I hope we don’t meet each other, any time
You deserve someone better
Maybe we’ll meet in the parallel universe again until then goodbye
Always always will love you
Baby ma ❤️
oh, I know it’s been so long since I wrote you a long paragraph, so here it is. I finished playing badminton. I came out of the court and I saw your notification. I opened your snap. He just took my breath, away all the photos. All the outfit, all the snaps, seeing everything, I would have die right there with happiness. Trying on different clothes, sending me every picture. it was beautiful. The kind of thing that would make me happy. It made me happy. You made me happy. It’s not like I think of you in the morning or in the evening, you’re always in my mind, you are always with me, even though you’re not with me. I still keep talking to you. telling you how everything is going with the first thing in the last thing that comes to my mind. Everything is beautiful when I am with you, everything is clear when I’m with you, everything is fine. you have become my everything, even though we fight, even though we exchange so many words at the end of the day. I wanna listen to you. I know I don’t tell this often, but you are the best person I’ve ever met. You do inspire me many things. I’ve learnt a lot from you. Thank you for everything east or west you are the best.
I wanted to try something different, so im reading out this for you.
Why do I love you so much? Even though you say you need a break from me, even though you say on my face that I am not the one why do I still always find a way back to you. Why do I dont care of my self respect in front of you. Why am I so addicted to you. One thing I dont understand is what is love actually.
My Pengi
I whispered of change, a promise to keep,
To be the one you desire, in dreams so deep.
Yet still, I’m a child, with love in my heart,
For you, my muse, from the very start.
Now, you’ve ascended, beyond my reach,
A phantom of touch, a distant speech.
To hold you once more, I must transform,
Every essence of me, to break the storm.
In the tapestry of time, today stands bright,
A beacon of hope, in the endless night.
It fuels my resolve, to fight for your grace,
In this poetic dance, of love and space.
I cherish you, my darling, my ma,
In the verses of life, forever to stay.
——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ———
talk to the past me,
he’ll listen music with you
he’ll read the book of “us”
and he shall find us back.
for you i’m just a kid
looking for touch of your ❤️
in this cold weather
he wants hold your hand
you ask “yen aythu”
i want to bring us back from the dead
do you want me to listen to my heart?
it’s ever addicted to you
it has be giving me crazy ideas
—-
i know writing a long paragraph isn’t gonna make you happy. past few days have been one of the best days of my life. all the calls showed love. it showed the time we had lost. i knew deep down that this wouldn’t last long. the time isn’t right. we dreamt of our future together. i could see that dream come true i can still feel it. but we both know that we don’t belong together. maybe the time isn’t right. before you go away from me, from the time i kissed you, everything i knew about love changed. love was never a feeling it became something much much more. every second with you became memorable. i loved every minute i spent with you. that love became addictive, it became like i couldn’t be without you. every time you were with somebody else other than me it became jealousy. it turned into me overthinking and blaming everything on you. from that moment on i couldn’t stop thinking about you and me. i had become very attached to you. i understand how difficult it is to bare me. i know im not easy. it was only you i was me. you know me. i know if i be in your life, you will not be happy. being with me requires a lot of sacrifice. the problem isn’t you it’s me. don’t blame yourself that i have turned like this. it’s all me. don’t be afraid to love someone again. not everyone are immature like me. you really deserve someone better. i really hope that person loves you like i do. just the love not all the dramas. because my love i’m proud of it. i really love everything about you. your nose, your eyes, ears mouth, every inch of your body. i had told you that time how i love how you scold me. i will really miss that. i miss you, you were part of my life. you have always been there, im proud that i loved you. i know ill miss you everyday. you had asked me alwa why i didn’t meet you on your birthday rithish and all could come but why i didn’t come even if i had shifted to pg. you’ll find the answer with you. this time it’s my birthday and it’s holiday. you’ll be at your house which is closer to me. but yet you won’t meet me. ask yourself why. you’ll know why i couldn’t meet you then. don’t ask yourself now. ask on my birthday day. leave that why talk about that. baby ma. i miss calling you that. in my head i still call you that itself. i know in this society men should have the upper hand but for me you should always have the upper hand because im a lofer and i take idiotic decisions but now you won’t be there to tell what’s right and what’s wrong. i hope in the pallel universe you and i end up being together i miss you call me baby ma. there was something in your voice. i hope your future boyfriend sees it. i what him to tell about your nose. accept him only if loves your nose. if you find him better than me it’s possible but if you find his love better than mine it’s fake don’t accept. no one can love you like i did. i’m trying all this as im eating briyani. i hope you have a good life. don’t accept the guy your mom shows. find your love. make a guy fall for you and compare his love to me. if you find his love better than mine accept it. just make sure he is more mature than me. i’ll try finding someone who’s scolding i can love. because after marriage i wanna get scolded everyday and everyday ill get flowers and seeing those flowers she will forgive me. i’ll find her if i don’t. i won’t marry any one. ritish and chinnu don’t know what you are. they were foolish to give up on you. i agree ritish is not giving up on you. but he ain’t putting the efforts like i did. i hope you find i person how doesn’t give up like i did. even after you scolded me my mom my parents my friends there was nothing that stopped my love. find someone like that. how is in crazy love with you. it’s been 8 years since i know you it was on 12/06/18 i had officially proposed you. it’s been so long. you were always there for me im always happy that i shared my life with you. i know that you being with me brings no happiness to you. you eventually get hurt because of me and you not able to take it any more and i accept it. i wish for a great year ahead with or without me. i hope you be happy and healthy. do exercise everyday. you ever saying alwa that shashank knows better that me. but i know that you won’t got to gym everyday. i know that you won’t go. but you should. i know you to be healthy. i want you to go. i want you to stay strong. i don’t want you to cry for a guy like me. you should be stronger that before. you mean the world to me baby ma. take care of yourself if you can’t take care of yourself i’m always there for you. you can call me anytime. i’m always there for you. in fact i’ll always be waiting for you. i’ll be waiting for my birthday. i’ll be waiting for what happens then. i don’t know what would happen on that day. but i’ll accept it no matter that. i’ll respect your decision. i’ll accept the reality how it. i won’t fight it i promise. i’ll leave all the weight on god. let him take care. if we are meant to be we will always find a way back to each other. there won’t be another thithi vade in my life.
After 10th of 10th
Smirnoff vodka
Roses and tulips
203
Reebok water bottle
Ring size -18
Masala munch
Allergie to fish
One thing that you have to know is I am never gonna forget you.